Minimalism – How I Live An Easy Life

At some point in my life, I started to realize that it’s okay to question the status quo. Actually it’s almost always a good idea to do so. The mental fog cleared and I finally could see that my life has run on autopilot up until now.

  • Why do I work I job that I don’t enjoy?
  • Why do I have a TV and watch videos that make me dumber by the minute?
  • Why am I doing any of the stuff I don’t really care about?

These kinds of questions were a great starting point to completely turn my life around and design it based on my needs as opposed to society’s. A lot of things become obsolete and started to seem useless. I started to flesh out the essential and cut away all the extra fat.

The following quote of the movie “Fight Club” probably sums up my current life philosophy the best.

The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide.

It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.

If figured if I know what I want in life, what’s important to me, then what the hell is anything else good for? The logical answer of course is nothing. It’s literally a waste of time, money or any other resource.

Most people would call that radical and I would agree. By societies standards it is quite a drastic approach to living your life. In my case, it’s just an easy way out –  a path to living a life that is simple, easy, stress-free and enjoyable. Time and other resources are carefully invested in particular areas that I am passionate about. This is where all the growth and progress occurs.

It’s important to note that it’s not about going against mainstream per se, but rather getting crystal-clear about what you want and then structuring your entire life only around it.

Here are some examples from my personal life.

  • I don’t own a TV. Sold it years ago. I only watch videos on my computer and these are carefully selected. There’s a couple of people I follow on YouTube in the niches of fitness, business and self development. Watching random bullshit on TV and reading the news are two very destructive habits. It’s fast food for the brain.
  • When I go out, I go to free clubs. Haven’t bought a drink in years. (In fact, I usually get tap water or crushed ice if I’m thirsty. I also drink a large bottle of water before I enter the club.)
  • I don’t own a car. Riding the bicycle to the train station, then public transportation from there on.

This kind of lifestyle isn’t about restricting yourself or being cheap. It’s about seeing the potential value whenever you invest a resource and then making a rational decision.

I admit, this isn’t always perfectly achieved because when strong emotions come into play the entire process can change.

I am sure you get the idea – here’s some examples.

  • Do I really need a new pair of jeans for $150 when I can get them for just $50? How are the additional costs justified?
  • Should I really drink anything but water when I care about my health and looks so much? Wouldn’t it be better to see food (and drinks) as nourishment for the body, not something I use to satisfy my appetite or distract myself?
  • What’s the real value of meeting up with this particular person? Can’t we discuss certain things on the phone and be done in a matter of minutes? Am I using this as an excuse to distract myself because I feel bored or any other uncomfortable emotion?
  • Am I enjoying the time I spend with friends? If not, should I reduce it or get new friends?

If you want to live an extraordinary life, you need to be very selective. You can’t do it all and neither can I or anybody else. Limiting yourself to that which matters the most – in all probability a few basics – will sky-rocket anyone’s quality of live.

Here’s what I care about in my life (in order of importance):

  1. Fitness & Health
  2. Finances & Money
  3. Hot Babes & Friends

That is really it. End of the story. Nothing else really matters to me. Sure, there are some lifestyle-specific things such as travelling the world and writing for my blog that I care about but overall the above mark the foundation.

I am not kidding, literally anything else is irrelevant to me. It’s hard to not drift off and think of something else whenever I encounter a piece of irrelevancy. It’s not that I do this on purpose, but rather that my brain doesn’t see any value in it and doesn’t want to expand energy on useless matters.

With the 3 areas above in mind, it’s really fucking easy to make big and small decisions in a matter of seconds. Even in the face of emotions such as fear (of missing out). Whenever I encounter such a sensation, I just ask myself if this is even something that’s important to me. Usually that’s not the case and I immediately turn my back to it.

Without knowing what you value, you’ll easily act irrational and often times on autopilot. I have made plenty of wrong decisions in the past and spent money where it wasn’t necessary. This is part of a development process that never ends.

This approach or life philosophy can be applied that almost anything.

  • Think you need to master a lot of sex positions? Just pick 2-3 you like and focus on them. That will be good enough for the rest of your life.
  • Wondering what you should eat next week? Make a list of 5-6 meals that you enjoy and do a rotation. (The more extreme version I follow contains only 1 meal with 2 different side dishes.)
  • Don’t like working out for hours on end, yet want to enjoy a fit body? Do a full body workout with compound exercises. 5×5 – and you’re finished in less than half an hour. Three times a week and you’re prepared for the summer.

This isn’t the end of all. As I experience life, I will continually set stronger boundaries and strip away things that don’t provide value.

Why Not Just Get A Hooker?

This is going to be a highly controversial one. Radical opinion, so to speak.

Have you ever thought about the difference between being with a regular woman versus a working girl (aka hooker)?

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This is something I absolutely love: ponder about opposing opinions, whether they come from friends or I simply read them online.

For myself, what I am really getting from meeting regular girls is Thrill & Validation.

Thrill in that sense that you’re never sure if you’ll get her, how it will end. Oh, and validation, well … that the feeling, that little ego boost you get after sleeping with a new girl. Here’s what I realized though … I actually feel bad after sleeping with normal girls – at least sometimes.

Really, I am thinking to myself, “All that effort, just for that little time in bed? Man, what a waste of time!

Recently, I got intimate with a lovely girl here in Bangkok. It was super easy, super fast. All in all, I’d say less than 30 minutes from meeting to landing in bed.

She was a massage girl & told me that beforehand. No, I didn’t have to pay … but even worse: she slept over. The experience was nice, she was the hottest girl so far & before I would’ve never thought I’d end up in bed with her.

… but you know what, I also had opposing thoughts. Like, I could’ve just gone to her massage parlor, paid 1,500 Baht & gone about my business afterwards. 

Don’t get me wrong, of course it’s only natural & healthy to meet regular women, but at some point it’s worth considering a change.

For example, I know that meeting women always means time & effort – even if all goes as quickly as in the example I mentioned. And the only reason I can justify putting in that time & effort is if I keep her around for longer. That brings me to my point: ONS & quick hook ups are absolutely pointless.

… and for exactly those, hookers are the perfect alternative.

The most common objection I hear from people is saying, “It just doesn’t feel real when you pay for it“. That’s funny, I’ve only ever heard that from guys that have never tried hookers and to expand on that – it depends on what you’re paying for.

Of course, if you’re paying for a 10 minute BJ on a dirty street around the corner, it won’t feel “real” … but a regular encounter (e.g. pulling a freelancer, going to a massage place) will just be if not more fun than a regular girl.

There’s even a service becoming increasingly popular called “girlfriend sex” or GFS for short. Hey, what more could you ask for?

While you’re in the midst of passion & fucking her, you are not suddenly going to pause, think and tell yourself, “I really shouldn’t be enjoying this because I paid for it and it should feel good!” … of course not, you won’t even notice.

The first time I tried this kind of service, I paid $75 for half an hour. Quite a good deal in my opinion.

When Is Paying For Sex Worth The Investment?

Horniness Level 1000+. If there’s no girls you can call up or simply want to experience something else – then hookers are they way to go. The process is time-efficient and as simple as ordering Chinese food. You just go there, pick a girl, and bang her.

Variety / Fetish. Blonde, African American, Latina, Asian, Pornstar, MILF. The entire spectrum. Whatever you are looking for, I can guarantee you it’s available in the world of pay-sex. Depending on where you live, it can be next to impossible to have sex with some type of girl simply because of availability. Some of the hookers I’ve fucked were really hot – to the point where I haven’t ever seen anything comparable in my daily life.

Real World Experience. In my case, this was the main reason I went there the first couple of times. I haven’t had sex, but also saw no point in waiting any longer. The experiences were invaluable for later on when I had sex with actual girls.

It made the process so much more enjoyable and more importantly it helped me feel comfortable in these kinds of situations. I have to admit though that before I had my first hooker, I also struggled with the idea of doing it. Does it mean I am a loser if I pay for sex? Eventually I got over my ego and just did it. Nowadays, I totally enjoy it.

Porn / Masturbation Alternative. I am sure some guys will lynch me for this advice arguing that it will take away all the motivation. Here’s my take on it: I am not a fan of watching porn, nor masturbation.

Both can be – depending on your current life situation – very destructive habits. On the other hand, there’s no denying that we all have the need for intimacy and sex. So, why not get the real deal – actual human contact – instead of jerking off to online porn? To me it sounds like a way better alternative.

What’s The Point Of Pursuing Girls?

The main benefit of meeting, dating and sleeping with girls is that you’re saving a whole lot of money along the way. No, just kidding of course. You could actually argue that the opposite is the case if you convert the time it takes on average to sleep with a girl to money.

When you can have sex so easily, why would anyone still go through the struggle and hit up babes in clubs or on the streets? Two very powerful benefits: Meaning & Emotion.

The entire process of dating can be a challenge where you are dealing with all sorts of obstacles, emotional up’s and down’s and you’ll never know for sure if you’re going to seal the deal. That makes it exciting and a great catalyst for personal growth. You never know which girl you are going to get next.

When you’ve finally slept with a girl, you’re starting to interpret the situation. What does this mean? It probably means I am an attractive guy, I am desired, and so on. All that makes you feel good about yourself. Your self image goes up one point. No hooker in the world can provide this – it’s only through your own effort that you’ll reap these kinds of rewards.

Review – “The Art Of Thinking Clearly”

Yesterday, I was lying in bed listening to an interesting podcast about self development, when the guest was asked to list his top 3 books. Among them was “The Art Of Thinking Clearly“.

Because “thinking” is so relevant in daily life, I had to look up the title immediately and started reading the book only minutes later.

Sure, I found out that a lot of the thinking errors were not relevant to my current life situation so I skipped a lot of chapters, but there were some nuggets of wisdom in there. After all, it was well worth reading through and investing 2 hours of my time. What I was able to take out of it was the following.

The chapter that I liked the most was “Never Pay Your Lawyer by the Hour: Incentive Super-Response Tendency” – simply because I wasn’t fully aware of it and more importantly it is relevant in a variety of situations.

To control a rat infestation, French colonial rulers in Hanoi in the nineteenth century passed a law: For every dead rat handed in to the authorities, the catcher would receive a reward. Yes, many rats were destroyed, but many were also bred specially for this purpose.

This is something I wasn’t fully aware of to be honest. Sure, with salespeople it’s pretty obvious what their agenda is, but in other areas I never really gave it a second thought.

Here I am quoting another passage from the book to clearly highlight what I mean.

Imagine for a moment that, instead of demanding enemies’ riches, warriors and soldiers are charged by the hour. We would effectively be incentivizing them to take as long as possible, right? So why do we do just this with lawyers, architects, consultants, accountants, and driving instructors? My advice: Forget hourly rates and always negotiate a fixed price in advance.

Another important realization was that it’s perhaps as important to know what you don’t want as it is to know your goals. Defining that which you are not after can make life a whole lot easier and save a ton of time. Something I will put into practice in various areas of my life.

Adopt a life strategy similar to a corporate strategy: Write down what not to pursue in your life. In other words, make calculated decisions to disregard certain possibilities and when an option shows up, test it against your not-to-pursue list. It will not only keep you from trouble but also save you lots of thinking time… Most doors are not worth entering, even when the handle seems to turn so effortlessly.

The final thing I want to mention is not really something that I’ve learned, but rather a chapter that reinforced my current behaviour. I sold my TV years ago, haven’t watched news since then, don’t listen to the radio or read the newspaper. In hindsight probably a very smart choice – if you believe what the author of the book – Rolf Dobelli – has to say about this topic.

 … two centuries ago, we invented a toxic form of knowledge called ‘news’. News is to the mind what sugar is to the body: appetizing, easy to digest – and highly destructive in the long run.

Overall, I am happy that I picked up this book. I will probably read it again in the future when some of the other chapters have more relevancy.